Category Archives: Misspelling

Why English Is Do Damn Hard!

Happy New Year, everyone! (I know I’m late but don’t judge me… please)

There is one thing that’s a-burnin’ a hole in my brain. What’s the hardest language one EVER has had to learn? English! Listen: irregular spelling in words as well as awkward pronunciation are key factors in the difficulty of English. There are countless rules that will have to be obeyed when learning English. No wonder English is so damn hard!

The first example comes from Why English is So Hard written by…. well, the author name is marked by Anonymous:
We’ll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes,
But the plural of ox should be oxen, not oxes.
Then one fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese,
You may find a lone mouse or a whole nest of mice,
But the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen?
The cow in the plural may be cows or kine,
But a bow if repeated is never called bine,
And the plural of vow is vows, never vine.

If I speak of a foot and you show me your feet,
And I give you a boot would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth, and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn’t the plural of booth be called beeth?

If the singular’s this and the plural is these,
Should the plural of kiss ever be nicknamed keese?
Then one may be that and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother, and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren,
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine she, shis and shim!

Confused? So was I. :-/ But try this one on for size:
“I” before “E” except after “C” or when sounded like “A” as in “neighbor” or “weigh.”
Um…. that’s just weird.

Bomb, comb, and tomb. The “o” in all three of these words have different sounds, and each word starts with a different letter. Yes, tomb as in the phrase “from womb to tomb”

So do laughter and daughter. Augh!!

Ditto for height and weight, sour and four, and lead and bread.

Spelling can be tricky, too…. silent letters be damned. (BTW damn has a silent “n” at the end.)

Going “Souht”

Yes, there is yet another misspelling on a highway chyron sign that I must share with you. This time, it happens to be in Ohio in which the sign spells South S-O-U-H-T. Aaugh!! Haven’t we learned our lesson in say, North Carolina (or was it “Souht” Carolina)? I know I need to stop smoking the reefer, but this is ridiculous! [no picture available at this time]

Well, at least they spelled “Cincinnati” right, right? Spelling that freakin’ city’s name is a pain in the ass.

“Wyng” It!

Remember, kids: it's W-Y-N-G-Z.

Just in time for Super Bowl XLV, DiGiorno — owned by Nestlé — introduced the greatest edible accompaniments ever to come with pizza called “wyngz.”

That’s W-Y-N-G-Z, not W-I-N-G-S.

They contain no wing meat. But under USDA federal regulations, the wyngz must be made of 100 percent chicken meat. Or should I say chyzykn, as per Stephen Colbert? Here’s the rub about them wyngz: no misspellings of this word are allowed! Ever!

What makes the wyngz convenient is it eliminates the need to worry about wing bones. They ARE made of chicken, right?

“Indepednence” Day

While we’re on the subject of sneaky misspellings, the sign on the overhead of Interstate 277 outside Charlotte reads “Indepednence Blvd.” You can’t make this mess up.

This sign should read INDEPENDENCE Blvd.

Get “Shcool”ed

This is why it is important to stay in school and get an education. A construction crew was supposed to paint the word “SCHOOL” on a road near a North Carolina school. Instead, the sign reads “SHCOOL.”

It's SCHOOL, you idiot!

This spelling faux pas was found on the intersection of Drake and Wall Roads outside Southern Guilford High School. What’s a “shah-cool”?

The San Francicso Giants?

It's San Fran-CISCO!!

Whoever misspelled the city of origin for the Giants’ baseball team jerseys is in GIANT trouble. Just ask poor Eugenio Velez, who had to don a top jersey with the name “San Fran-cic-so.” Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up.

But the Giants pulled through, beating the Houston Astros 10-4.

Call me crazy, but didn’t we notice a jersey mistake last year? Last April, Adam Dunn and Ryan Zimmerman of the Washington Nationals wore jerseys reading “Natinals” for three innings. I don’t know what a “Natinal” is. Anyways, the company that made the uniforms was aware of the mistake and apologized for it. Just don’t ever refer to the World Series Champions as the New York “Yanees” or I will be forever pissed.