T&A By TSA

When traveling during the big Thanksgiving rush, if you find yourself being inappropriately touched by an airport security agent, the “Underwear Bomber” may have been to blame.

The Transportation Security Administration, or TSA, unveiled a full-body scan as part of airports’ security systems to detect prohibited items before passengers attempt to board their flight. I think airport security is a good idea, but the TSA has taken it waaaaay too far. First of all, you’re supposed to keep your privates… well, private. And another thing, who puts a bomb in their underwear?

If neither the metal detectors nor the full-body scanners give the all-clear sign, then the TSA agent may have the right to do a pat-down search. And yes, groping will be involved. Woah! Them TSA voyeurs are a bunch of sick fucks as far as I’m concerned — excuse my French, garçon. As creepy as it sounds, these new security measures are supposed to keep us safe, right? Wrong. We can’t bring our jumbo-size liquids on board anymore. We’ve got to take off our shows. Now they expect us to bare it all before the doors to the airport even open in front of us. What is this world coming to?

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